Are you the victim of an unwanted pregnancy? Did you forget to pull out of your last one-night-stand or high-priced prostitute with a heart of gold? Well friends, have I got a service for you.
"Airbornetion" is the new wave sweeping the nation for those unexpected seed-sowers who don't want the hassle of dealing with a pricey doctor, or can't find the time to provide a ride to the free clinic. For a small fee, I will find your insignificant other and "accidentally" toss her down the stairs or out of a (slow) moving car. Problem solved. Clearly I went to Business School for a reason. Call me. Don't let something like this ruin your whole senior year like it did for Damone.
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