Paperless Tiger

While many media outlets claim to have found Tiger Woods' alleged emails to his mistresses, Franchise has used his many resources to gain access to actual texts from former Mets GM and ESPN personality, Steve Phillips, to his paramour.




Steve P: "Your gut really hurt me when you fell for/on me the other night. I don't know whether I am really into you, or I just miss Mo Vaughn. Either way, my 2 year/$6million offer stands if you will change your name to Schoenweis. I love you bitch and I am gonna wear you out if the Wilpons allow it."

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Steve P: I can feel it in your gut that we are meant to be together. My wife is hot and you are so different than that.

Whore: what does that mean?

Steve P: Never mind. What are you eating right now?
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Steve P: When I see you, I am gonna hug you like Harold Reynolds would.

Whore: that's freaky babe. Lol.

Steve P: I wouldn't trade you for anything in the world. Well, I would probably trade you for Todd Hundley and a player to be named later.

Whore: What? What does that mean?

Steve P: Shut up. Your OPS would suck if it were a measurement of weight and/or hotness.
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Steve P: send me some naughty pictures.

Whore: (sends pics)

Steve P: OMG! Did I accidentally text Wally Backman again? That was disgusting.



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Steve P: I just took two Ambien. I can't wait to...(long pause)

Whore: Steve?? Are you asleep again? God dammit, I am ordering Dominos on your credit card!
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Steve P: Do you like my new goatee?

Whore: it reminds me of my (expletive deleted).

Steve P: umm yeah if I had two hamhocks on either side of it instead of cheeks, Miss Piggy.hahahaha

Steve P: Oh (expletive deleted), that was good. I am sending that to Keith Hernandez.


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